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Writer's pictureAmetria Maryland

Breaking Behaviors 

Are you tired of yelling and being frustrated with your kids over the same behaviors? Well, so I am! This is the part of parenting I was not looking forward to. I knew it wouldn't be sweet and shiny every day, but I also didn't expect to feel this frustrated about behaviors I combat with daily. Especially, the whining and crying about every little thing.


In this parental journey, I am learning that much of my frustration with my children's response to discipline has a lot to do with my impatience to their reaction. I just want them to do what I have asked without whining or crying. But I have come to realize that their reaction is normal and developmentally appropriate. We have to teach them discipline and equip them with tools to deal with their emotions.


I'll share with you that if you are still having to spank or punish for the same repeated offense, it's not working and it is time to try something else. I have chosen to incorporate a positive reinforcement chart. Redirecting my attention to positive behaviors will lessen my attention to the negative reactions. I've got nothing to lose, hey what if it works and if it doesn't, at least I tried. But I am hopeful that it will make us more aware of our emotions and reactions to everyday routines and situations.


Here are a few things to consider when creating a chart:

1. Relevancy-the goals have to relevant to the behaviors you want your children to work on. If putting toys away is a constant problem, set it as a goal.

2. Motivating- the reward should be something they will want to work toward a trip to someplace or purchase of something special.

3. Patience- this process will take some getting used to. Trust the process and breathe.

Remember breaking behaviors is a learning opportunity


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